THE AFTERLIFE

As a Columbia University graduate, model with Eileen Ford and TV commercial actress, I'd shared an exciting life with my husband, actor and former paratrooper, Tom O'Rourke. He'd worked as a regular on all the "Law and Order" shows, done many supporting roles in films and on television, co-starred opposite Sandra Bullock in the TV series "Working Girl" and was Justin on the soap opera "Guiding Light". 

Then I had the 'Death Coach' dream the year I lost Tom, my husband of 35 years, to cancer; my electric meter reader predicted exactly where I would move; my husband sent me a dream message in a movie to prove to me he was still with me; and when I could no longer doubt it was really Tom speaking to me from the afterlife, he confessed his marital infidelities. 

Modeling and acting are two businesses that trade in sex appeal, so neither of us was naïve when it came to sex. We both knew our way around the casting couch and how to take care of ourselves by the time we fell in love, got married and lived happily ever after for 35 years. Best friends forever, right? That's what I'd always believed, but I was wrong.

When Tom showed me he'd been running after other women throughout our marriage. I was heartbroken and astounded. Why would he do that? Only by taking another look at our love story and having the secret desires and fears of his heart and soul revealed to me by a psychic medium was I able to piece together the reasons for Tom's sad flight from the true love he always said meant so much to him.

It's still very hard for me to believe in the afterlife, or that the dead can visit us, and that God is everywhere around us. But now I understand how my Screaming Eagle with the broken wing feathers got very lost in life and was unable to find his way back to truth and love until after he crossed over. I know my friends think I'm a raving lunatic widow trying to reconnect with her dead husband. Actually, he contacted me to confess. It's taken buckets of tears, months of furious anger, and all the love I ever had for him, but I finally get it. I know who Tom really was. And if I can't totally forgive him, I can at least understand what happened to him and love the man he tried to be. 

This book is my true story of how love reached out from the afterlife to show me that in every way possible God is love, and even when we aim in the wrong direction, God's will brings us back to spiritual grace.